Roseanne For Rosie

Don Kaplan writes in today’s New York Post:

Roseanne Barr has emerged as the top contender to replace Rosie O’Donnell next year on “The View,” sources say.

A rep for Barr says she has not been approached.

The Post’s headline, “Ro-Placements” is perfect.

I thought I might weigh in on this, having seen Roseanne perform about a month ago at New York, New York in Las Vegas.

If (and this is a huge if) Rosie is leaving because of her outspoken behavior, Roseanne will be no different. She was not shy on stage. There are lots of people, policies and lifestyles she has opinions about.

If, on the other hand, ABC is looking for another Rosie, this might be a master stroke. As I said, she’s outspoken. She is also fast and funny with excellent comedic timing.

As with Rosie, I don’t see Roseanne as a team player. I can’t imagine Roseanne and Barbara Walters sitting in the same room with Barbara asking Roseanne to come as their new savior – though she’d have to. I can’t imagine them having a meal or traveling together – and they won’t.

Barbara Walters is New York affluence – a woman who never learned or needed to drive. Roseanne is a semi-conscious parody of her own classless Utah upbringing.

Roseanne Barr would be an excellent hire.

Our Last Vegas Show

This is the part of the trip I like the least… getting ready to leave! We’re not done vacationing, but we still have to make sure the loose ends are tied. Helaine’s in charge of all this and I marvel at her efficiency and organizational skills.

Dinner tonight was the Grand Wok, a very nice Chinese restaurant here in the MGM Grand. We shared two appetizers. Helaine ordered a shrimp lo mein dish while I had beef tenderloin, asparagus and a black pepper sauce.

Mine was marked spicy on the menu, but it was more flavorful than hot. All in all we were very pleased with our dinner. As in nearly always the case in Vegas, the service was attentive and friendly.

We headed across Las Vegas Boulevard to the New York New York Hotel. We had tickets for a show tonight and this one was an interesting choice. Actually, it was a difficult choice – not a slam dunk by any means.

We saw Roseanne Barr.

I remember watching Roseanne the first time she appeared with Johnny Carson on the Tonight Show. She was truly a breakout star from that very first moment on-camera. A Jewish housewife from Salt Lake City, her performance was totally unexpected – words and actions!

Some people can take success, others cannot. Roseanne was in the second category.

After burning white hot, he career careened. There were work related difficulties, canceled shows, bad marriages and that incident with the National Anthem. It was as if she was working hard at being a failure.

We had heard rumors the original Roseanne was back. That’s why we bought tickets to see her in the Cabaret Theater, a small (450 seat) venue.

Opening was Jackie Beat, a female impersonator/comic. It was, to say the least, a little strange. Though engaging, Jackie was doing (mostly) predictable shtick. Hey – it’s an opening act.

Roseanne came on and she quickly won over the house. She’s a grandmother now. She a little more realistic and fatalistic in choosing her subjects. Still, the observations of life that made her domestic goddess persona so enjoyable came through.

It was a reasonably tight set by an (obviously) professional comedienne. Both Helaine and I laughed a lot. I hope Roseanne can maintain.

We returned to the MGM and I headed directly to the poker tables. I needed a little more before going.

I played astoundingly tight. For 45 minutes, I played one hand! Considering a ‘blinds’ of $3 per round, I was down $15 before I really began to play.

I started to build a nice stack until getting clobbered in a big hand. I mean really clobbered. I reached in my wallet and bought more chips.

One the next hand… the very next hand… another monster pot. Again, I went all in. This time it went differently. I was within $25 of my starting point.

It never happens like that… except when it does! I continued to play, finishing the night nicely up.

I’ll probably play a little tomorrow before leaving, but right now I’m up. It’s not a lot, but I’m not down! I lost all the tournaments I entered, but won nearly all my cash sessions. That was the difference.

I had a great time and really can see a difference in my no limit cash game play. I was cautiously aggressive. When I had a hand, I did my best to keep ‘limpers’ out. I never got ‘married’ to my cards… OK, seldom did I get married to my cards.

There surely was some luck in my winning. Over time, luck evens out. I hope my good play stays.

Still Having Fun

I played in the noon Hold’em tournament at Caesar’s Palace. It’s a great tournament because of the blind structure. You start with a lot of chips and can wait a while before committing to a pot.

I didn’t do all that well… in other words, I didn’t cash. I’m still ahead, though not by much.

While waiting for the tournament, I was hungry. I went to a place that looked casual… coffee shoppish, if you will – Bobby Flay’s Mesa Grill.

I sat at the counter and had the 16 Season Chicken Salad. It was really tasty and I especially liked the goat cheese.

I have taken way too many photos. It’s come to the point, when I see tourists taking a photo, but one of the is not in the picture, because he’s taking it, I offer to take it for them! I’ve done that at least a half dozen times so far – maybe more.

Tonight we see Roseanne Barr, across the street at New York New York.

Off To Vegas

We ended our big October Southwest trip in Las Vegas, where I promptly got good and sick! I’ll spare you the details, except to say I never saw the face of the doctor who came to our hotel room to administer an injection in my butt&#185!

We’ve always enjoyed Las Vegas, but this trip left Helaine a little shaken. She was reticent to go again.

Long story short, the opportunity arose, we’ve got free Southwest tickets, and we leave tomorrow. We’re going to undo the jinx of October.

We’re staying at the MGM instead of our ‘usual’ Mirage.

Of course I want to play poker, but we’re also going to a few shows: Barry Manilow (who we saw on our first date!), Gordie Brown and Roseanne Barr.

I know Manilow has supporters and detractors with no middle ground. It will be interesting to see what he does as a ‘house act’ at the Hilton.

Gordie Brown is also a house act. He’s an impressionist who plays the Venetian. In fact, I first saw him during “Impressionist Week” on Letterman and was favorably impressed. Helaine, who scours the Vegas trip report boards when a vacation approaches, has read lots of good things.

Our last choice is much more chancy. Roseanne Barr has become another house act. She’s just opened at New York New York. Both Helaine and I watched her first appearance on the Tonight Show, blown away by how funny she was. Then her career skyrocketed and crashed.

Is she still funny? Has she seen the error of her ways? I’ll let you know.

Keep your fingers crossed for good weather at Midway in Chicago. We’re on a one-stop.

&#185 – The doctor’s bill was declared ‘off network’ and originally rejected by my insurance carrier. If you’re really sick, you’re entitled to get a doctor without shopping for one who has signed the right papers. After lots of grousing, and two internal reviews, they paid it all, save the co-pay.

The insurance company, in Rhode Island, neither knew nor cared who I was.

Bottom line – If you’re in the right, don’t give up. That’s $435 in my pocket, not theirs.