The Relapse


A few days ago I posted how my ill health had abated and how surprised I was at that.


It had only gone underground temporarily. My blogging radio silence is testament to its tenacity.

Please don’t misunderstand–I’ve been sicker. But this was the total package. How can every bone, joint and muscle in your body ache all at once? How can you weaken so much in just a day or two?

This came at a terrible time. My friend Peter and his girlfriend Nancy were visiting. I saw them yesterday and today, but for a limited period of time.

We went to Thalia Street Beach in Laguna this afternoon. I walked the stairs up and down to the beach and was done! We said goodbye. I went back to bed.

This early evening I’m feeling better. Hopefully it lasts into tomorrow when a few friends come by.

I think curing the common cold would make for a great Kickstarter project. I’d pledge to make it happen.

Bless You

Let’s start with an important medical advisory. Keep away from my house!

I have a cold. Helaine has a COLD. I can’t remember her ever having one like this. She can’t either. She has the cold all others will be judged by!

Bless you.

How many times have I said that today?

Is there a daily max? Is there a statute of limitations? Can one be overblessed?

If it’s a double sneeze do you get blessed twice?

Am I even vaguely qualify to toss out blessings?

The feds say Americans get around a billion colds a year. They also say there is no cure. No joke.

Adults aren’t supposed to run a fever with a cold. Helaine is the exception. I didn’t need a thermometer to figure that out. I have standard daddy powers which include temperature sensing.

Four years ago the Times published a story on the common cold and revealed,

“We are now quite certain that we see the Achilles’ heel, and that a very effective treatment for the common cold is at hand,” said Stephen B. Liggett, an asthma expert at the University of Maryland.”

Tick, tick, tick. I’m waiting.

The real problem for Helaine is she can’t stop being the caretaker. It is a force more powerful than the cold and much less common. I can tell her to take it easy, but it falls on stuffed ears.

I hope she starts getting better tomorrow.

I’ve Got A Cold

The wastebasket under my desk is starting to fill up. Tissues. I’ve got a summer cold. That sucks.

I just went to take a photo of the discarded tissue collection and thought the better of it. I’ll use the box instead. You’re welcome.

Like most colds this one has come in stages. The sore throat started a few days ago. By this afternoon it was fading, but almost immediately the sneezing began. I’m not stuffed yet, but that surely comes next.

I’ve got zinc lozenges I’m sucking on. They come from GNC, therefore suspect to me. That shows the depth of my desire to somehow get the better of the cold. I’m willing to do stuff I don’t believe will work!

I might take Sudafed or one of the “quils.” I have no faith in them either.

I’ve just come back from a week’s vacation. An arm will have to fall off before I take a day off from work.

You would think someone would have a cure for the common cold by now. Wouldn’t this be the shortcut to the world’s riches? What would be a bigger seller?

Until then I’ll be worshiping the team that invented Kleenex Lotion tissues and kvetching.

You may start saying, “Aw, poor baby.”

The Second Worst Cold In The World

I have bad news for her. It’s not the worst cold in the world. That cold is reserved for her father!

Stef left work early yesterday. She stayed home today. She has a cold. I know my daughter is suffering because she hates missing work.

I have bad news for her. It’s not the worst cold in the world. That cold is reserved for her father!

Monday night she swigged Nyquil which helped her sleep. When she woke up she tried Dayquil. Sorry, her ‘quil’ success rate stands at 50%!

“You know it’s bad,” she said, “I went through a whole box of tissues today.”

Compelling evidence, but number one worst cold still belongs to me. That’s obvious from my outward suffering when I have one. I am a stoic. I’d never kvetch just to raise the level of drama. Honest Helaine, I wouldn’t.

Why can’t we cure this common cold? Shouldn’t there be a “Common Cold Research Bureau” working feverishly to help those working feverishly?

Last year Britain’s Independent said,

Scientists believe the first clinical trials of new drugs based on the findings could begin within two to five years.

I’ve got a dollar pound that says we’re still two to five years away!

Back when Stef was a baby and got the sniffles she was often a nose blow away from relief. Babies don’t know how to blow their noses. It hurt me to see her discomfort.

Your child is always your child. It hurts me to hear of her discomfort today.

Hopefully she’ll be on the mend tomorrow. If the normal cold schedule holds true she might feel nearly human by the weekend.

In the interim maybe Helaine can FedEx her some chicken soup?