Las Vegas – Page 4 – Geoff Fox: My Permanent Record

West Coast Bound

It survived the jaywalking ticket I got within my first few hours there (I don’t think I ever paid that ticket). Jaywalking? Seriously, I was from New York City. Jaywalking is a competitive sport in New York City.

From the South Bay to the Valley

From the West Side to the East Side

Everybody’s very happy

‘Cause the sun is shining all the time

Looks like another perfect day

I love L.A. (We love it)

I love L.A. (We love it)

We love it

Oh Randy Newman. How right you are! I head out Saturday morning for Orange County and then Los Angeles.

I have a forty year love affair with Los Angeles. It survived the jaywalking ticket I got within my first few hours there (I don’t think I ever paid that ticket).

Jaywalking? Seriously, I was from New York City. Jaywalking is a competitive sport in New York City.

Once I was up for a job at a TV station in Los Angeles. I was very excited. The TV station itself was located in a seedy neighborhood, but on a movie lot! Helaine and I had already decided where we would live as we counted our chickens before they hatched.

The last I heard from the guy with the job was, “We’ll call you back in a half hour.” Isn’t it always that way?

It’s a long trip from CT to CA. Saturday’s flights out includes two hours of thumb twiddling in Las Vegas (not long enough to leave the airport). It will be nearly nine hours before I deplane at Santa Ana’s John Wayne International.

This time of year Southern California suffers under the marine layer, a cool wedge of oceanic air which brings low clouds, fog and drizzle overnight through late morning. I don’t care.

Even when I’ve been in rainy Los Angeles I think of it as sunny. That internal lie seems easier there.

The purpose of my trip is to photograph my Cousin Melissa and her family as she begins her political career. I’m bringing most of my photo gear including two camera bodies. She will, if nothing else, be well documented.

After the weekend in Orange County I head to the San Fernando Valley and the “secret location” I’ve written about in the past. I’ve got dinner with two long time friends scheduled for Tuesday.

My Folks Go Back To Florida

My parents are both significantly older than they look or act. That’s no small compliment

The phone just rang… or whatever it is they do nowadays. “I’m sorry. Did I wake you?” It was my mom calling from Atlanta. They are halfway home. She knew after we dropped them off at the airport I’d head back to bed. I am much more easily predicted than the weather!

It was a successful trip. They got to watch their last grandchild graduate college. They were in the studio for my 25th anniversary. We spent lots of time together.

My mom had back problems this past winter. She could hardly walk. Yesterday she went to Manhattan with Helaine and Stef. “I walked 8,000,000 steps,” she said. Later it became, “I walked 9,000,000 steps.”

My parents are both significantly older than they look or act. That’s no small compliment.

My dad who had his own back problems yesterday and doesn’t match up well against a hot New York day stayed home with me. This is what is meant when the words “quality time” are used.

What we did wasn’t as important as the fact we did it together! I’m saying that because I think we watched MSNBC for 12 or 13 hours straight. If I saw Dick Cheney one more time I was going to waterboard myself!

My dad and I went to the diner for dinner. Just two guys going for omelets.

It’s a place I’ve been going to for 25 years so as we left I started to talk to the boss and then a few of the waitresses. The conversation got around to Las Vegas and my dad took out “the picture.”

Holy crap, he carries it around!

We joked around at how lucky we were to have the wives we have. He said he couldn’t figure out why Helaine settled for me when she could have done so much better. He was joking–right?

After a full week my parents were ready to return to Florida. Their friends are there. It’s in their comfort zone. There’s BINGO tonight (which they play though both claim they hate it). Now they can rest.

There’s another trip in store for them before this year is out. They’re going to Milwaukee. This winter they’ll become great-grandparents! My niece Jessica, their first grandchild, is expecting.

Where they live in Florida becoming a great-grandparent is equal to winning an Olympic medal.

Miss USA–Yeah, I Watched

At least two girls had all-purpose answers which they were going to use no matter what the question. Mission accomplished.

Helaine and I watched Miss USA tonight.

From Las Vegas, but live at 4:00 PM PDT. Is there anything less sexy than Vegas in the daylight? They used all nighttime exteriors!

I’m told the female host is from NBC’s Earl. Horrendous. Awful. Stiff. Cannot read. Made Billy Bush look good.

Billy Bush–worse than he seemed.

Miss Connecticut has very long legs but didn’t make it to the top-10. That seems unfair.

They make the contestant answer questions… controversial questions. That’s not fair. At least two girls had all-purpose answers which they were going to use no matter what the question. Mission accomplished.

I don’t like Donald Trump and this show did not dissuade me.

A few of the girls wanted to go into TV news. Good choice because being pretty and wanting to be seen and adored are the two qualifications necessary. Welcome aboard.

Las Vegas Wrap-Up

In case you’re wondering I’m told it’s $2/minute for a massage. It’s in the poker room. This is not a ‘happy ending’ kinda thing.

There are a few unfinished tidbits from Las Vegas I wanted to get in. I know business is down–tragically down. I couldn’t see it. The city was as busy as I’ve ever seen it. The casinos were rockin’. It’s my understanding the outlying casinos have taken this worse than the Strip, but I never went there. Maybe I just hit a good week?

There are lots of construction cranes that are silent and still in a town that used to build around-the-clock. From outward appearances Echelon seems dead in the water. There was some, but less activity at City Center, mid-Strip.

There are lots of good stories in Las Vegas. My current favorite concerns the animus between Sheldon Adelson (Called the “tallest man in the world when standing on his wallet”) and fellow casino magnate and New Haven native Steve Wynn. Allegedly Adelson positioned the Palazzo Hotel in such a way as to limit the sun at Wynn’s pool to an hour or two a day.

Is it true? Who knows. Good story anyway.

Over the past few years I’ve watched the increase of masseuses giving massages to poker players while they play! In Vegas, where every woman is already good looking… where it looks like the cocktail waitresses have gotten leg extension surgery… this takes on added sparkle.

Lily (pictured left) was giving a massage to the guy in the seat to my right one night during the Venetian’s 7:00 PM tournament. I’m not sure it really made it more difficult to concentrate, but that case could easily be made.

During a break I asked her how long she’d been doing it and whether it had made her stronger. She held her arms up at shoulder level with her clenched fists inward toward her head. Wow!

In case you’re wondering I’m told it’s $2/minute for a massage. It’s in the poker room. This is not a ‘happy ending’ kinda thing.

I had my camera with me a lot while in Vegas. I was never asked to put it away except once while I shot participants in a slot tournament. One night I even used the tripod while in the Palazzo’s spectacular casino.

Finally, Helaine and I found the funniest slot machine ever. Even better it acted as if it was our own private ATM!

“Invaders from the Planet Moolah” features cows as the wild card match. The funny part is the cows moos (obviously humans not even trying to pass as cows) are slightly delayed from each other making each ‘hit’ slightly different and weirdly comical.

This machine would be fun to play even while losing which is both sad and scary. Luckily we didn’t have to find out first hand.

Favorite line from the trip: “Oh look, a penny slot machine. Anybody got change for a nickel?”

About That Last Entry

Today we also experienced our first funny TSA agent. His name tag said “Wallace” and he was at McCarren in Las Vegas

I could have sworn I entered text in on the last entry! I used my Blackberry which might not be the optimal solution to blog posting–obvi.

More on the trip over the next few days. A few quick words about Southwest Airlines. We are such huge fans. If you think it’s some cramped, cattle call thing you’ve never been aboard.

Today’s flights were no exception to the usual Southwest experience with flight attendants having such a good time it made us have a good time. Our plane change in Chicago was painless and, even adding this stop, took around two hours longer than the coveted non-stop.

Today we also experienced our first funny TSA agent. His name tag said “Wallace” and he was at McCarren in Las Vegas. As we were removing our shoes and loading our stuff onto the X-ray machine he was humming tunes. He asked Helaine to step into “the aquarium,” that glass lined sniffer machine used to make sure my wife isn’t a terrorist.

I asked if I could take photos so you’d know what I was tlaking about. You’ll notice there is no photo.

We’re home now and exhausted.

Some Night Shots From Las Vegas

More To Vegas Than Poker

Until recently this sign was among the world’s worst traffic hazards. It sits in the center median, but there was no place to safely stop and park and everyone wants a photo there. Within the last few months a small parking lot has gone in. I waited a few minutes for a space to open.

Man cannot live by poker alone… or so I’ve heard. We have done other things in Vegas mainly because of Helaine’s voluminous pre-trip research. This is something she does for every vacation and we’re well served by it. It’s amazing what you can find out before you set out which can save you time, money, or both.

Did you know there’s an airplane viewing area in Las Vegas? I didn’t. It’s a well paved parking lot adjacent to McCarren Airport’s active runway. There’s even a low-power transmitter so you can listen to the tower. It’s a few minutes from the Strip and “Clicky” wanted to go.

The view is excellent. I understand why there’s a chain link fence, making photography a little more challenging, but I wish it wasn’t there. I remember back in the 60s an observation deck at Idlewild Airport (now JFK). There were coin operated radios which played tower comms. Those days are not coming back.

We headed back to Las Vegas Blvd and turned north toward the Strip. Our next stop was the iconic Las Vegas sign. Yes, there’s a photo with Helaine, but she is very camera shy.

The area in front of the sign is Astro-turfed! There is a burm to facilitate raising people a little closer to sign elevation. Judging by the people I saw most returned with a shot of the giant sign with teeny stick figure people beneath it.

Today we decided to take a walk down Las Vegas Blvd toward downtown–north. Old Las Vegas is too far to walk, but the remaining original hotels on the strip are in this direction.

We walked past the Fashion Show Mall and the Wynn/Encore complex. At this point the Strip thins and tawdry’s out. There are a few halted construction projects. I’m seeing a lot of that here nowadays. Huge construction cranes are looking quietly over exposed concrete and rebar.

I’m not sure if this is related, but there is now a company that rents construction equipment for off-road joyrides! Given a little more time I would seriously consider renting a big machine for some fun. Here’s the link, but a warning–it is a noisy site!

We walked as far as Circus Circus and walked in. Last time I was there was 1974. Little has changed!

It felt old and tired and in need of a bath. I know there was a time someone thought circus acts, gambling and a kid’s arcade all made sense. They don’t seem to now.

We walked back up LV Blvd, stopping at Wynn for a close-up view of the waterfalls. There’s a real emphasis on water features here in the parched desert.

Before I go I will say something about poker. I played two tournaments yesterday. My play is as good as it’s ever been. I didn’t cash in either. Then I sat down at a $1/$2 no limit table at the Venetian and won back my two entries plus a little.

A guy sitting next to me was drinking a beer with a really cool label. I asked him about it and ended up ordering one, though I don’t usually drink! It was a “Fat Tire” amber ale. Alas, it tasted like beer!

I love the label.

A Day Of Poker In Paradise

I guess the dressing room for the “dolls” is behind the poker room because every half hour or so two well built and scantily clad girls walked by with a fully dressed female chaperon.

When I am in Las Vegas I play poker. I am a decent poker player in a city of excellent ones. It’s a challenge which is my fun. I’ve been playing in tournaments because you can get a lot of play with relatively little money at risk.

I played the noon tourney at Caesars and was doing really well until I got a pair of Aces dealt to me. That’s the best starting hand you can get. Unfortunately, another player at the table got lucky and ‘cracked’ them. I was gone.

I went back and found Helaine here at Palazzo. We had an early dinner at the Mirage Buffet. Vey nice. I could easily weigh 600 pounds.

More poker this evening. I headed back to Caesars where there are tournaments every three hours. The 9:00 PM tournament is a bounty tourney. I’d never been in one of those before. The prize pool was split between bounties for knocking other players out and the more cash for the final three of the 27 entered.

I won one bounty and held on until we were down to six. At that point I asked if anyone was interested in a deal. Amazingly everyone was amenable and we chopped the pot into four smaller and two larger shares. I was quite happy walking away with some cash.

This was a really fun table with people from all over the country and two men from Holland who deal at a casino in Amsterdam. No arguments. Everyone was very, very nice with good chitchat and stories.

Meanwhile, the Caesars poker room is adjacent to their “Pure” nightclub and Pussycat Dolls blackjack area. I guess the dressing room for the “dolls” is behind the poker room because every half hour or so two well built and scantily clad girls walked by with a fully dressed female chaperon.

I complained to the floor manager they were stalking me. That got a good laugh.

Some Tuesday Photos From Vegas

A few shots from today in Las Vegas. Evi asked for food, so I’ve included breakfast!

Vegas Baby

We are here. We are in the room. This hotel, The Palazzo, is the nicest place we’ve ever stayed.

Our trip to Las Vegas was rather uneventful. Our flight left late and arrived early. The plane had a party atmosphere, which meant noise… lots of noise while we wanted to sleep.

We are here. We are in the room. This hotel, The Palazzo, is the nicest place we’ve ever stayed.

It’s considered all suite and the room is large. It’s divided into two, but it’s really one room. Our view is north toward Wynn and the Desert Inn golf course.

We have dinner at the Grand Luxe, their idea of a Vegas coffee shop. I had a pasta dish which was excellent.

This evening I played in the nightly poker tournament. I didn’t cash, coming in 17 of 74. I played very well and was pleased what I was able to do with the cards I had. No regrets.

You’ll notice a number of photos with huge umbrellas. They are part of an art theme in the hotel. I’m not sure why, though I’ll try and figure it out.

The Cardiologist Tells My Dad To Wear A Halter

In November he walked effortlessly through the streets of Las Vegas. He is the picture of 83 year old health. I worry anyway.

See embarrassing addendum at the end of this entry.

I called my mom as I got into the car for my ride home tonight. We speak most evenings.

“We went to Dr. Saltzman,” she said.

My parents go to the doctor’s office like most folks go to the grocery store. In South Florida there are specialists for every body part and bodily function. This doctor is the cardiologist my dad sees.

“He noticed something on the cardiogram,” she continued.

It was 11:40 PM when I spoke to my mom. Either I was an afterthought or she didn’t think this was pressing.

She went on to explain my dad would wear an instrumented halter for a day and the doctor would make decisions based on that.

Here’s where my generation and my folks depart. I asked my mom what the doctor said the problem might be and what would be the treatment? Nothing. My parents asked no questions. How can you not be curious in a situation like this?

I know my dad will read this first thing in the morning, so let me make perfectly clear, I understand it’s a generational thing. Their generation was brought up not to question those in authority, whereas my generation… well this is a photo of my generation in action questioning authority. I spent the better part of a decade doing nothing but questioning authority!

My dad is a miracle of medical science. His arterial plumbing has been cleaned and rerouted in the past. In November he walked effortlessly through the streets of Las Vegas. He is the picture of 83 year old health. I worry anyway.

Were the shoe on the other foot I would not be so sanguine. I would ask more questions. But in the end, like my dad, I would place my faith and fate in the hands of others.

—————-

Embarrassing addendum:

Tonight, my friend/physician Steve sent the following:

In the piece about your father, the cardiologist almost certainly DID NOT tell you dad to wear a ‘halter.’ If he did, his man boobs would probably stick out. What he more like was told was to wear a HOLTER, as in Holter monitor. That’s a device that records the heartbeat for as long as you wear it (typically 24 hours) to look for abnormal heart rhythms.

Holter, not halter. Different spelling. Different concept.

Sturm and storm.

In Vegas Sex Still Sells

“$35 special,” says one. “$47 special,” say another. Tina’s “TOTALLY NUDE” ad claims her $99 charge includes “no hidden fee’s”

Now that we’re back a few people have asked me about the economy in Las Vegas. I don’t usually go in late November, but the crowds were certainly down from what I’ve seen during the summer. That’s probably expected. Helaine was told some casinos have put their dealers on a four day week. The housing market there has tanked.

There’s still a lot of construction–huge construction nearing completion. Someone’s going to take a bath there. Who’s coming to City Center when it opens? It’s a $9 billion investment for MGM-Mirage. Who’s filling Adelson’s Palazzo or Steve Wynn’s new luxury tower Encore?

I just got an email ad from Wynn tonight. They’re seeing tough times if they’re down to my level.

Last recession Las Vegas proudly said it was bulletproof. And it was–then.

A number of years ago… maybe when they were scared of the last major recession, Las Vegas decided to re-brand itself. It would become family friendly. Think “Vegas Vacation.” That’s gone.

Walking the Strip I passed the Flamingo. It’s an older hotel. It would be considered nice any place else where there isn’t as much competition. The entire casino is covered with an ad for Donny and Marie, their current house act. Under the D&M sign a doorless doorway opened to the casino where bikini clad go-go dancers did their thing above a blackjack pit.

The Strip itself is an amazing flesh peddling supermarket. Let me make myself clear, there are no obvious (well, to me) streetwalkers. There are dozens and dozens of exceptionally short (under five feet) Hispanic (mainly) men from somewhere in Central America who help these unseen women advertise.

Holding a stack of what seem to be playing cards they slap against their upper leg then thrust a card for you to take. Of course they’re not playing cards. They are ads for ‘entertainers’ and ‘dancers’ who will come to your hotel room. The ads show women of every color and persuasion, some beautiful, some innocent, some overtly slutty. They are all erotically alluring.

“$35 special,” says one. “$47 special,” say another. Tina’s “TOTALLY NUDE” ad claims her $99 charge includes “no hidden fee’s”

Tina, there no apostrophe on “fees.”

Stef wanted to know if the girl you got was the one pictured–like I’d know. After reading the Elliot Spitzer stories I’d guess not. Girls to your room are a fungible commodity.

In tiny mouse print on Roxy’s ad it says, “If paying by credit card, nature of transaction will not be reflected on statement.” I would have guessed they’d play that up?

For the first time this past week I saw men passing out cards while having a lit sign strapped to their body. That was among the more surrealistic moments of the trip.

All the girls have (I saw no men advertised) phone numbers. Most also have websites!

Since the cards are given out on the street there is “protection” for the kids. These nude women have their nipples obscured. Sometimes it’s with a star or other printed symbol. Most times it looks the the nipple has had a glowing led attached! It looks like some sort of ‘breast ray.’

They re-did the Mirage a few years ago. Until they did hookers would hang out at the Baccarat Bar late at night. OK–do I really know they’re hookers? No. But they were. Helaine and I would often scope them out critically on our way to our room. It was part of the Las Vegas charm.

From The Airport

It was only a few bucks and I didn’t even care about the dollars involved. I just wanted an acknowledgment. He pushed back. “Maybe this car just gets really bad mileage,” he said.

I’m writing from Gate C4 at McCarren International (and on their WiFi). Why would you name a gate after a a deadly plastic explosive?

Helaine had trouble sleeping and was out of the room before I was awake. I had no trouble sleeping. These beds are firm with a pillow top.

It’s December, but it’s hard to tell out here. I looked out our window when I got up. The pool had guests yesterday. Now it’s drained. Closed for the winter. That’s sad.

As I was getting out of bed Helaine was coming back to the room. I showered and we headed for breakfast at the Carnegie Deli. After my week of poker, I went to see the manager. Maybe they’d like to buy my meal? Within a few seconds I was the proud possessor of a $15 food ticket. The comp has been converted to ‘black and white’ cookies from the Carnegie! Poker is low profit for them. Any food comp is a big deal.

While Helaine finished the paperwork, I waited for the bellman. As with all of Las Vegas, he was chatty. He was working for his tip. Mission accomplished. Ten minutes, ten bucks and we were at the North Valet Parking stand.

If you ever go to the Mirage, here’s my one worthwhile tip. The North Valet is much faster and easier than the man area–especially for auto pickup.

We got in the car and headed up Las Vegas Boulevard for the rental car center. All the rental companies operate under one roof about a half mile from the airport. I had to stop and top off the tank. I’d only gone 90 miles or so. I expected to put in a few gallons at the most.

When the pump got to 5 gallons I started to get upset–then 6 and 7. When we got to Enterprise I said something to the attendant. You are about to get a story about good and bad customer service.

The attendant checking in my car immediately copped an attitude. It was only a few bucks and I didn’t even care about the dollars involved. I just wanted an acknowledgment. He pushed back. “Maybe this car just gets really bad mileage,” he said.

Seriously? Is this guy nuts? He had taken something inconsequential and elevated it. Now it was a matter if principle. I needed a manager.

In stepped Anthony who took control and took responsibility. I told him I didn’t want any money. I just wanted Enterprise to understand my upset. He said all the right things, including a promise to talk to the attendant. He handed me my receipt and I walked away reasonably satisfied.

When I looked at the receipt, he had taken $13 from my bill. I turned around and told him I didn’t want that, but he wanted to do right by me and he did. Good for you Enterprise.

Though I checked in within minutes of our flight’s available time, we were given “B” boarding passes. I think we’ll still sit together, but I was surprised. Probably a lot of others connecting with our Hartford flight at Las Vegas who were able to checking before us.

We pushed our bags to the curbside checking where we were told one bag was eight pounds over. Uh oh. Actually, no big deal. The skycap invited Helaine behind the counter to shift some weight to another bag.

And there you have it. Sometime around midnight Eastern we’ll be back at Bradley and home by 2:00 AM.

It seems like we’ve been gone a month!

Making The Most Of The Last Day In Vegas

For the next two weeks the rodeo is in town and Las Vegas is full of boots, hats and oversized belt buckles

Things are winding down. We said goodbye by Michael, Melissa and Max who then set out to drive back to Orange County, CA. We will miss them. Melissa has become Helaine’s sister.

We were stared at on our way down in the elevator. Then, somewhere between 18 and the lobby the man asked if I “was the newsman?” They were visiting from Wolcott and will be on our return flight. This is why I can only vacation with my wife.

A little poker–with good luck–then dinner with Helaine at California Pizza Kitchen. We’ve had the same guy as our waiter for at least five years and he was back with us today. As usual, I had a Jamaican Jerk Chicken Pizza.

Just across the way at the sports book they’re setting up for some country acts. For the next two weeks the rodeo is in town and Las Vegas is full of boots, hats and oversized belt buckles. Anybody gotta Bud?

It’s quite the eclectic group. The Mirage closes Cirque’s Love for two weeks of vacation while the rodeo’s in. This is not a French/Beatles crowd!

I went up to the room for a little while and on my way down got into the elevator with a guy holding a professional Canon HD camcorder. I asked a few questions and he told me he was shooting construction at the Mirage volcano. It’s currently under construction and officially closed. But, he said, it was going to be tested at 5:00 PM.

I did go back to Venetian for the 7:00 PM tournament. Early on I had 3-Kings, only to find someone with “7s full.” I think I was first out!

If nothing else, Vegas is visually over-the-top. And, whatever was splashy last year has been trumped by something splashier this year… and brighter… and larger.

What Is Wrong With This Picture?

I’m not even going to check the official readings. Let’s just establish whatever they are, that’s perfection.

What is wrong with this picture? Nothing!

Currently in Las Vegas it’s sunny and around 70&#176. I’m not even going to check the official readings. Let’s just establish whatever they are, that’s perfection.

I was up very late last night playing poker. I didn’t get back to the room until an hour normally reserved for degenerates. My poker skills have been sorely lacking on this trip.

Playing last night, however, was incredible. It was like hand-to-hand combat. I spent five or six hours just grinding it out.

This morning’s schedule took us to the Venetian. Cousin Melissa had an entry in a slot tournament, so we went to root her on. We’ll know if she won later today.

Helaine and I have another 48 hours to go. This is a tough pace to sustain. I’m going to nap. I’d like to play in a poker tournament tonight.

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