I’m a Loser

The diet’s over. Down 26 pounds at my minimum, but undoubtedly going back up. The immediate weight loss on Atkins/South Beach is rapid… as is the immediate regain. I understand that.

There are certain mistakes that I don’t want to make again. So, this afternoon while Helaine was standing nearby, I went to the refrigerator. She looked on and reminded me not to be foolish after I had worked so hard.

I came out of the ‘fridge, holding a Diet Pepsi – which was what I went in for.

My whole life, I have told anyone who would listen that diet drinks don’t taste anywhere near as good as the real, sugared, carbohydrate packed, thing. I still feel that way, though the bitter aftertaste of artificial sweetening has greatly diminished.

It has been my experience that the people who drink diet soda are, by and large, heftier than those swigging Coke or Pepsi. Now I’m one of those I reviled. A middle age loser, gulping a drink with no fat, protein, carbohydrates or calories, and certainly not tasting anywhere near as good as the real stuff. Looking at the label, there is little in this Diet Pepsi that wasn’t born in a laboratory.

It’s sad. Where did my ability to live on Hydrox Cookies and Coca Cola, without putting on a pound, go?

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