I left work late last night – around 1:00 AM EDT. We went on after the NBA Championship game.
You know those annoying folks who are always chatting on their cellphones as they drive? That’s me! At 1:00 AM I called my California cousins. How could I have known what a good time it was to call? There was a story to tell.
My Cousin Michael is married to a great woman, Melissa. The family did well when Melissa became part of it.
When she was 11, Melissa first discovered she was adopted. As an adult, she’s been looking for her birth mother.
As I listened to the story that would unfold, I realized how little I knew or could understand about this part of Melissa’s life.
Finding someone who, at least at the time, didn’t want to be found is tough. You have to connect the very few dots there are and make assumptions which may or may not be true. The search might lead to your parents… or not. They might be glad to hear from you… or not.
There can be no expectation, because you really know nothing. It’s is the unknown in the truest sense.
Yesterday, after finally being told who her birth mother was, Melissa made the call. The first time her mom wasn’t there. The second time she was.
Melissa began the call in her best lawyerly fashion. She was an attorney, calling from Southern California. Was this… and she gave the woman’s name. Was your father… then his name.
I can’t remember exactly what Melissa said next, but after both questions had been answered in the affirmative, I think it was, “Oh my.” Then, she told the woman on the other end why she was calling.
As I said, this call could have gone in any number of directions. It went well. It went very well.
Within minutes of making the phone call, Melissa found out who she was in the context of her birth – something she’d never known before. She had two half brothers – very tall brothers. Her mother found out she had another grandson.
Melissa was ecstatic to find her mother and based on what she’s told me, her mother was relieved and happy to find Melissa.
While they chatted on the phone, emails started flying. Photos went back and forth between California and the Rockies. I’ve seen them. You can see the strong family resemblance.
She spoke with her mom. She spoke with her brothers.
I would assume the next step is for them to meet. Though blood kin, they really are strangers. It’s tough to know how this will all come out. It’s just as tough to understand how this has changed Melissa.
The discovery took an instant. The implications will span her lifetime.